“No one leaves me.”
Toxic people live in a delusional world that only they can see and interact in — and in their delusional world, they do not see people (human beings) as individual souls and agents of reality.
No, to these toxic people, people are just tools, toys, instruments for their pleasure.
The idea of telling a toxic person, “Hey! This isn’t working out, I think we need to split up,” will not get you an “Okay! That makes sense. All I do is cause so much drama, and I think it's best for your sanity to leave the nutjob that is me.”
This will NEVER happen.
Toxic people, narcissistic people, people with personality disorders are NOT OPERATING from a level of reason, logic, and sanity.
Narcissists see us as an extension of their minute will.
Toxic people see us as a plaything.
And people with personality disorders such as BPD, DPD, PPD see us as their means to survive (And I am NOT ATTACKING PEOPLE WITH PERSONALITY DISORDERS — they truly go through hell, and I wish them strength in overcoming their very REAL demons that only they see and face).
Sitting down and having a heart-to-heart with these people will not change anything, and they will not just “get” that they are the problem.
And depending on the type of toxic person you are dealing with; you can expect:
- Blameshifting — “YOU MADE ME DO IT.”
- Projecting — “I ONLY DID IT BECAUSE YOU WERE THINKING OF DOING IT FIRST.”
- Gaslighting — “I didn’t do that…YOU did that.” (Check out this ebook, “Are you being gaslit?” These people know how to distort people’s perception.)
Having a mature conversation with these people is NOT going to happen, and sadly what could have been an amicable separation will probably end up badly.
Ghosting Is Not Revenge…It Is Freedom
The issue that arises with sitting down and telling a toxic person you are leaving are:
If You Are A Female
He will most likely get violent.
Toxic guys are not above hurting females if that female has hurt their ego and feelings.
These guys have no problem with taking things even further.
“If I can't have you, NO ONE CAN.”
Do you get the message here?
Why give a lunatic this kind of heads up that you are going to leave.
If you were kidnapped by a sociopath, tied up, thrown in the turn of a car, put into a basement, and chained up, to only have the sociopath says “you will say here forever” — to then discover keys to your chains that are keeping you locked in the basement on the floor right behind you, would you say, “Hey, Mr.Sociopath, I am going to unlock myself and leave this basement, but I know you did this because you had such a poor upbringing. Let’s sit down and talk about why you are so deranged.”
Or would you leave ASAP?
Of course, hopefully, this would be the latter and not the former.
Being in a toxic relationship IS LIKE being in prison.
And if you can leave, you will not do it telling everyone; you will do it sneaking out because that is the SAFEST WAY TO GET FREE.
If You Are A Guy
Now, if you are a guy, it is NOT COWARDLY to ghost a toxic girlfriend.
Quite too often, we hear about male privilege.
As if, in 2021, in America, that is even a thing!
Male privilege in the WEST is NOT A THING.
Are their douchebags males in America and the WEST?
But are we as bad as some guys on the other side of the planet who not only mistreat their wives, but they actually OWN THEIR WIVES, SISTERS, DAUGHTERS, as if they are property.
NO! NO, WE ARE NOT.
And let’s not bring up prostitution.
Yes, pimps are out there holding women for ransom, but some women are doing that as well.
But back to the point.
For men, it is also very liberating and freeing to ghost a female as she may hurt herself and then blame it on you.
It is not uncommon for these toxic females to block the doorway so that you cannot leave, and you will have to touch her, which she will use to her advantage.
It is not uncommon for her to threaten to hurt herself and even cutting herself right in front of you.
It s not uncommon for her to THROW HERSELF IN FRONT OF YOUR CAR.
Toxic females are PSYCHOTIC.
She can hurt herself, call the cops on you and make you seem like the bad guy because of “VICTIM PRIVILEGE.”
Ghosting is not cowardly if you are a guy; it is a brilliant move.
And we must stop with this idea that women cannot hurt men.
YES, THEY CAN!
And it is not always physical.
The mental, psychological and emotional toll can be just as bad as physical and just as nasty as what guys do to females.
Ghosting Is Not Revenge…It Is Freedom
When dealing with an irrational person, sitting them down and having a RATIONAL conversation is like trying to boil an egg in ice-cold water.
IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
Sometimes, talking it out is just not good enough, and the only sane thing to do is to ghost someone and move on SILENTLY with your life.
Not everyone is deserving of an amicable separation.
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